


Falling for You (to Catch Me)

by DarkPoisonousLove



Category: Winx Club
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe, Because it's me, Blood and Injury, Christmas AU, Christmas Decorations, Christmas Fluff, Christmas fic, Denial of Feelings, F/F, Fear, Fluff, Friendship, Hugs, Humor, Implied Sexual Content, Insecurity, Kissing, Light Angst, Loneliness, Meddling Friends, Meet-Cute, Mistletoe, Multi, No Magic AU, Photos, Plans For The Future, Poetic Justice, Snow Globes, Stargazing, Stars, all of that tbh, also this is the closest i'll ever get to writing a Coffee Shop AU, anyway it is now, holiday themed, in the past though, is that like... a thing?, not described in detail though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-20
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:54:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21865543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkPoisonousLove/pseuds/DarkPoisonousLove
Summary: Faragonda is swallowed by the Christmas chaos when she slips on a patch of ice and tumbles right in the middle of the best Christmas present she could've wished for. It seems that miracles do happen on Christmas.
Relationships: Faragonda/Griffin (Winx Club), hints of Griselda/Zarathustra (Winx Club), mentions of Faragonda & Griselda (Winx Club), slight Ediltrude & Griffin & Zarathustra (Winx Club)
Comments: 19
Kudos: 11





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am so proud of the descriptions in this so... feel free to appreciate them. ;D

Gone. All her time and money were gone. She couldn't really regret anything since they’d been well spent at that Christmas bazaar that was raising money for charity but she still had to go and buy something for Griselda. She had a ton of Christmas trinkets now but she wanted it to be something special that she’d picked for Griselda and not just something she’d assigned for her for the lack of resources she was currently facing, but that meant going back to the dorms to get some more money.

She needed to unload her purchases anyway but the fact that it was cold and she was in a rush didn’t make the trip all that pleasant. She was exhausted and just the thought that she had to go back out instead of curling up in bed with a cup of tea and that book she wanted to finish before Griselda gave her her own Christmas present–it had been a total accident that she’d found the book while she’d been going through Griselda’s things in search of a pen she’d later remembered she’d thrown out the previous week–made all leftover energy drain out of her. But she had to do it for Griselda. It wasn’t her friend’s fault that she’d let all her time that was planned for finding the perfect gift slip through her fingers. For a good cause, of course, but nonetheless...

Her luck seemed to have abandoned her, too, as she slipped on a patch of ice that she hadn’t seen in her hurry and lost her balance.

She closed her eyes preparing for the impact of the fall but it didn’t come. Instead she felt two arms coming underneath hers from behind stopping her fall, holding her firmly as whoever had caught her helped her back on her feet and didn’t let go until she was stable again.

“Thank you,” she said, slightly out of breath and with burning cheeks which she hoped her savior would ascribe to the chilly air, as she turned around to look at the person.

She was met with a pale woman that was taller than her, whose expression was serious but her bright honey-colored eyes were warm like the sun. They clashed well with the vibe she was giving off with her wine red trench coat and black gloves that looked more like accessories rather than like they were serving any actual purpose in protecting her from the cold. It was like she refused to be bothered by it which the lack of a hat also suggested. It did leave her long light purple hair that was braided and falling over her shoulder fully on display so that it could enchant Faragonda with its shine.

“You’re welcome,” the woman spoke, her voice elegant and mellow even with the certain edge which seemed to be present in every aspect of her. “Please, do me a favor, though,” she said, grasping all of Faragonda’s attention and holding it on her like she was the center of the universe. “Be more careful when you walk because I’m not sure I can be there to catch you next time you slip,” she was serious again but still with that warmth coming off of her that didn’t allow Faragonda to take her words as berating and left her with a fuzzy, yet, still somewhat embarrassed feeling as she realized the woman truly cared for her. Or at least she cared that she didn’t break a bone on the sidewalk.

“I’ll do my best,” she said, nodding to support her words since she didn’t know how to express her gratitude. Not only for the rescue but also for the way the woman handled the situation, without making her feel clumsy or incompetent. It was a rarity that someone would go through the trouble of doing that for her, and people usually took her optimistic outlook on life as an invitation to be blatantly rude to her because she’d find a way to pick herself up after they were done demolishing her. “I was in a hurry because I need to get something for my friend,” she explained, hoping to focus on what she still needed to do rather than on the unpleasant thoughts.

“I’m sure your friend would prefer to have you safe,” the woman said, her eyes locked with Faragonda’s as if that was the way to get the message to the depths of her soul. And it seemed to be working. “And if not, then they don’t deserve you,” she said, her features turning somewhat sharper, though her gaze remained caring enough to make Faragonda take the words as advice rather than meddling into her life.

She nodded again, for it was all true. Griselda wouldn't want her hurting herself just to get her a present and cutting toxic people out of her life was something long overdue since some people would never change no matter how many chances she gave them and that was becoming painfully obvious the more she forgave them.

“Thank you again,” she said because, really, the woman had only been in her life for a minute and she already felt like her guardian angel. “I’d like to invite you to a cup of hot cocoa,” she blurted out before she could think. But the thought that they’d go their separate ways and would never meet again was scarier. She’d already had one miracle happen to her that Christmas, she couldn't count on another one. If she wanted to make the kind stranger a more permanent part of her life, she’d have to take the initiative.

“Didn’t you have to go get something for your friend?” the woman reminded, almost making her facepalm.

Of course! How could she forget? It would turn out it was her who didn’t deserve Griselda if she kept going on like that. Or rather, it would be confirmed since she already suspected something like that. Griselda claimed it was because she wasn’t used to basic decency thanks to all the shit her family had put her through when she’d deviated from the expectations they had set for her, but she knew it wasn’t just that. Griselda seemed cold but was actually a very caring person. Much like the woman currently standing in front of her but in a different way. Griselda hid her real behavior behind a feigned one while the woman that had caught her seemed to combine both sides in her personality and made her want to learn more about how such a balance was possible. It didn’t mean she needed to forget all about Griselda, though.

“Perhaps another time then?” Faragonda asked, amazed once again by herself and by this strange woman she’d met. Going after what she wanted was not her strong suit since it had been frowned upon in favor of the family agenda her whole life and she was still trying to shake that learned stiffness and conformity off. The woman had managed not only to not embarrass her with the gentle reminder she’d given, but also to make her keep pursuing what she wanted. It seemed like she’d fallen into the right hands.

“I’d like that,” the woman gave a small smile that could make the ice Faragonda had slipped on melt. Good thing the snow had already melted because the streets would've been flooded by the water just like Faragonda’s heart was flooded with warmth. “Although, I am more of a tea-all-year-round kind of girl,” she said, hugging herself as if the cold finally got to her now that she was missing the warmth of her favorite drink.

“Tea is my favorite as well,” Faragonda reassured, watching the other woman come out of herself like a flower that grew from under the snow when caressed by the first sun rays of spring. While she could understand the hardships of tea lovers–it was so annoying to be asked all the time if you’ll be drinking tea again, especially on the holidays when everyone was drowning in hot chocolate or eggnog punch or at summer when your cup was unsightly compared to all the rest that had cocktail umbrellas in them while everyone was hiding under beach umbrellas and your drink was the only one that wasn’t ice cold–she was somewhat concerned by the reaction. The woman seemed to retreat in herself as if she expected to be slapped with judgment the moment she’d revealed her favorite drink. So maybe Faragonda wasn’t the only one who could use a friend–or rather, another friend–and the miracle had gone both ways. “How about having a covert tea party then?” she asked, lowering her voice to make it sound conspiratorial.

“It’s a date,” the woman returned in the same tone of voice and it was the first time Faragonda didn’t have her childishness frowned upon–as much as Griselda loved her, there were things that pushed her over her limits and that was one of them–and once again made her feel like she’d met a soulmate. It was truly the magic of Christmas. “How about tomorrow? Eleven o’clock? The campus cafe?” The woman was all business now, her sharpness intact once again but it just washed over Faragonda like a blanket of security to have her potential new friend be herself.

“It’s a date,” she said, making the woman’s eyes sparkle with amusement, and they looked like the day sky was filled with stars, light amongst more light, such a breathtaking sight. “I’m Faragonda by the way,” she said as she offered her hand, looking to touch all the tenderness that was standing in front of her as a person.

“Griffin,” the woman said as she took her hand, her grasp gentle on Faragonda now that she didn’t have to keep her from an unpleasantly intimate meeting with the ground. And the full smile that made her face light up had all of Faragonda’s thoughts circling around it long after it had remained only in her head. It was a sight that would stay with her for a long, long time and she hoped she’d see it again, in real life and not just in her memories, and soon at that. And she was definitely glad that the days where she hadn’t known that smile were gone now.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two years after Faragonda fell in Griffin's arms their friendship is going well to the point that they're celebrating Christmas together when a sweet little tradition threatens with the possibility of another downfall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With a little over 5k words comes the second chapter... We should've all known there would be a second chapter. There always is a second chapter. -_- Don't get me wrong, nothing against more ideas but I am running on a tight schedule here. The good news is that those were ideas I was planning on writing anyway so... this wasn't really counterproductive.

Griselda’s apartment looked nothing like it’s usual. Of course, that was to be expected since Christmas decoration was only hung around at that time of the year and it was the first Christmas after they’d gotten their degrees and had found their own places. What was unexpected was the ridiculous amounts of mistletoe hanging around the apartment that didn’t allow you to take two steps without being caught underneath one and having to kiss whoever happened to be next to you at the time.

It had been the twins’ idea since Griselda looked just as uncomfortable with it as Faragonda was but she’d gone along with it and Faragonda had a good idea why. All three Ediltrude, Zarathustra and Griselda seemed to navigate the rooms carefully so that they were always far from Faragonda and Griffin, upping the chances that the two of them would have to kiss when they inevitably got caught under the mistletoe. Griselda had been insisting for months that Faragonda tell Griffin about her feelings which made no sense since Griffin already knew how much Faragonda valued their friendship. It was unspoken since neither of them wanted to offend any of the other three women but they were best friends. There was nothing to say since they didn’t need words to communicate.

Griffin had pulled her to the side, however, to talk to her, revealing that Ediltrude and Zarathustra were playing a prank on them, hoping to make them squirm for the rest of their Christmas celebration. And of course, she wouldn't be Griffin if she hadn’t come up with the perfect plan for revenge already. She’d offered that they turn it against them by actually kissing like their life depended on it and leaving the twins and Griselda flustered instead. And Faragonda had accepted, hoping that Griffin would brush off the loud beating of her heart that she could certainly hear as the effect of the adrenaline of foiling their friends’ scheme.

Griffin herself had seemed to be getting quite a kick out of it since her own heart had been pounding under Faragonda’s palm when she’d pulled her into a kiss, wrapping her in her arms, her lips on Faragonda’s even softer than her embrace just like Faragonda would've expected them to be if she’d ever thought of them more extensively. And they parted when she slid the hand that wasn’t enchanted by Griffin’s heartbeat in the long purple locks, letting a bit of air come out in a rush and brush against her own lips as if begging to be let in her mouth and mingle with her own breath to feed her life. It had been the perfect opportunity to deepen the kiss and touch Griffin’s being with the tenderness Griffin had shown her at their first meeting when she’d saved her from falling–though, it might have caused a whole another fall–but she’d pulled away, lest she fell too deep down their rabbit hole.

Griffin had apologized for the sudden kiss, explaining it had been practice for the ones that would surely follow considering the apartment was like a minefield of mistletoe, her breathing ragged and making the words sound harsh. And the abrupt way she let go of Faragonda, like she’d been burned, when she'd realized she was still holding on to her was harsh too, but Faragonda had tried not to think about it too much since it was bound to happen again. For all the kisses that would follow would be fake.

They were on kiss number eleven currently and had been given a rest now that Griffin had gone to the kitchen to make the eggnog punch–she’d only been allowed in there after she’d sworn she wouldn't spike it–but Faragonda’s mind kept drifting to that first kiss even as she watched Ediltrude kiss her sister on the cheek when they ended up under some mistletoe themselves only to get shoved away playfully. It had been different from the rest that had been more racy and even somewhat empty even though Griffin’s tongue had been in her mouth and her lungs had been full of Griffin’s breath as they put on a show in front of their friends who’d seemed rather disappointed that their plan had backfired and that had seemed to inspire Griffin to get more creative with her charade. She’d even dipped Faragonda once, making all her blood rush to her head and make her dizzy.

And even after all of that, that first kiss still stood out. Griffin had called it practice but it had been more than that. It had been more real since there’d been no mistletoe to compel them to kiss, just their own free will. And even if they’d been pushed by spite–or some other not so selfless intentions–all of that had melted away once their souls had connected just like their bodies had. She’d felt closer to Griffin than ever and that had seemed impossible to accomplish right up until it had happened. She had to wonder if perhaps that was her Christmas miracle this year–she’d met Griffin two years ago, and last Christmas they’d been on vacation together, getting her the gift of sleeping in Griffin’s arms–and she didn’t want to be ungrateful but she couldn't imagine having to wait another year for more.

“Faragonda, will you come give me a hand in here?” Griffin’s voice came from the kitchen, drawing not only her out of what she was doing, but also everyone else.

“You need some more love, Griffin?” Ediltrude yelled, her eyes locked with Faragonda’s the whole time and a wide grin appeared on her face, making Faragonda shake her head. She was used to Ediltrude’s teases by now and sometimes even found them funny since she’d never had a friend quite like that. This time she could’ve lived without them, though. She wished they would all stop meddling in what was none of their business.

“No, Faragonda’s all I need,” Griffin yelled back, her voice sickly sweet to the point where it nearly made Faragonda wince. She knew that sound well and it was like the quiet before the storm. Or in this case – the honey before the lemon. Only, Griffin didn’t just get bitter, she got vicious when she deemed someone deserving of punishment, and Faragonda was certain Ediltrude knew that–perhaps even better than she did–but it didn’t seem to faze her in the slightest. It could have something to do with the fact that she was on her second glass of whiskey already, though, Faragonda doubted that. Ediltrude could hold her liquor and had no measure when it came to the smart comments.

Ediltrude sighed dramatically. “I guess we’re just here as props in your love story,” she said as if to prove Faragonda’s point before walking over to Griselda since she needed a new victim now that she’d gotten everything she could from the situation.

“Well, you heard her,” Zarathustra spoke while chewing some popcorn, the bowl of it that was now half empty clasped tightly in her hands. Faragonda just hoped that she wasn’t taking the whole thing as a replacement for some comedy show she’d skipped on watching since they’d agreed on no TV and phones in order to truly be together. “She needs you,” she looked like she’d even give her a nudge but that would require her to get closer which could prove ill-advised with all the mistletoe hanging above their heads like an omen of doom. “Griffin will kill me if I get stuck underneath one of those with you,” Zarathustra added as she looked up at the offending things as if she’d read her thoughts before shoving another handful of popcorn in her mouth and going to join her sister who was having the tables turned on her. 

It seemed that Ediltrude’s idea to torture Griselda had gone horribly wrong as she was currently caught in the middle of a lecture against getting wasted which only made her roll her eyes and drink half of her whiskey at one go and that, in turn, had Griselda’s eyebrows knitting. It was the perfect moment for Zarathustra to interfere before a fight could break out between the two, and she seemed happy to assist, the threat of the mistletoe pushed somewhere at the back of her mind.

Faragonda didn’t have time to dwell on that curiosity as she headed for the kitchen to see how she could help Griffin. She’d hoped they’d have some alone time but the thought had fled her mind with everything that had happened in the short period after they’d all gathered.

Frankly, aside from the war with the mistletoe, things were going better than she’d expected. Griselda was holding up considering the fact that Ediltrude had put her feet up on her coffee table before noticing her extensive book collection and deciding to go through it by pulling out everything all at once, sending Griselda’s organizational system to hell, and Zarathustra had set out to thoroughly explore Griselda’s mini bar, mixing herself a cocktail which should have been less concerning than it was considering her Chemistry degree but, alas, they’d all been afraid of some part of her concoction exploding or–the more likely option–of her poisoning herself. And that was all considering that Griselda had limited their access to the living room only and was watching them like a hawk. She’d complained that they’d already wrecked the other rooms when they’d been putting up the mistletoe and Faragonda would've been more sympathetic if said mistletoe hadn’t been brought in for the sole purpose of inconveniencing her and Griffin.

Griselda had managed to handle the situation, though, by getting into a long debate with Ediltrude over the origin of tarot cards–Faragonda wasn’t sure why that was of such interest, besides of course, Ediltrude’s passion for divination and Griselda’s competitiveness–and had brought out the popcorn as a peace offering between her and Zarathustra. She’d even laughed at one of her jokes which could be too dark if you were unprepared for them. They could probably even be described as having fun and the phone ban had been lifted for a few minutes so that Ediltrude could show pictures of the Christmas hats she’d made for her two snakes, making even Griselda admit that they looked weirdly adorable. It was all good up until the moments when the dreadful mistletoe would come into play and force her and Griffin to go along with their plan.

“What can I do?” she said as she walked in the kitchen to find Griffin leaning on the counter as if she was ready to examine the catch of the day. It made her heart speed up once again as she wondered what was going on in Griffin’s head. She wasn’t quite certain what her reaction would be to another potential scheme of Griffin’s to mess with their friends. The one they were already following seemed like a double-edged sword.

“I need a knife,” Griffin said, the look in her eyes decidedly malicious and the words startling her for a moment as she panicked that her thoughts might have been loud enough for her friend to hear.

“A knife?” she echoed as she couldn't move from her spot, studying Griffin carefully as she was trying to figure out what was going on. The eggnog punch was already in five glasses that were placed on a tray and everything seemed ready. So unless Griffin had decided to take the revenge up a notch, she couldn't figure out what she could possibly needed a knife for.

“Yes, I can’t open the packet of cinnamon sticks,” Griffin said as she grabbed said packet to illustrate her words. “I already sacrificed the tea, might at least have the cinnamon,” she explained pensively as she left the cinnamon sticks back on the counter, her energy lessening tangibly at the mention of her noble sacrifice and Faragonda had to admit that she understood. Tea had become their drink not only because they shared each other’s passion for it, but also because they had quickly become friends over it when they’d first had some together at the campus cafe. And they’d kept sharing secrets over a warm cup of tea, growing closer and closer to each other’s hearts. “I have no idea where Griselda holds her knives, though,” she folded her arms as if to both demonstrate her helplessness and try to deny it.

Faragonda smiled at her theatrics. “You could’ve asked Griselda, you know,” she said as she walked past Griffin to open the drawer with the cutlery. Not that she minded helping her out. Quite the opposite, in fact, especially when she knew that Griffin had specifically requested her help. Maybe she wanted some alone time, too, and now was probably their last chance for that since Ediltrude had brought her entire arsenal of nail polish so the next few hours would probably be devoted to manicure.

“No, I couldn't have since she’d tell me that cutting the packet with a knife is not the most efficient way to open it and would then start lecturing me to the point where it would be a miracle if we managed to get our eggnog punch before next Christmas,” Griffin said, grimacing and gesticulating dramatically and making her laugh.

“I suppose that’s not very far from the truth,” Faragonda said as she grabbed a knife and turned to hand it to Griffin who moved to take it but stopped before pulling it out of Faragonda’s grasp. “What is it?” she asked, tensing instinctively at the sight of Griffin’s stiffness. It reminded her too much of that first time she’d seen her tense and try to hide herself and all the times it had happened after that. It didn’t happen often, but when it did, it always had her heart clenching painfully in her chest because Griffin deserved better and she hated the fact that sometimes she was helpless against the demons in Griffin's head.

Griffin turned to look at something and Faragonda followed her gaze to see some more mistletoe hanging from the cupboard right above their heads. Ediltrude and Zarathustra hadn’t even spared the kitchen in their attempts to prank them. They weren’t there, though, so those were efforts wasted.

“We don’t have to...” she felt herself trailing off just in time with her heart sinking when Griffin pulled the knife out of her hand but the disappointment didn’t have time to set in when she heard the ring of the metal against the kitchen counter.

Griffin cupped her cheek and drew her into a kiss that was nothing like the ones when they’d had audience. It was slow and sensual, making her head spin so hard that she had to grab at Griffin’s waist to steady herself and not miss any of the softness she was being snowed in under. Griffin’s tongue was less invasive and more giving this time and she let it in her mouth not because of their plan or because she couldn’t refuse to, but because she wanted to. All the previous kisses had been somehow obligatory–except maybe the first one and she had yet to find the words and courage to thank Griffin for not making their first kiss like that, but that would mean maybe saying more than she was ready to–and she hadn’t been able to quite enjoy them. Of course, she couldn’t have stayed completely impartial to Griffin’s lips on her own but something had been missing, and now it was as clear as day what that had been. They’d been so wrapped up in getting back at their friends that their souls hadn’t been able to reach each other, but now with nothing else in the way, they were free to sink into each other completely.

They merged into one being and it was a feeling that Faragonda had felt at one point or another of their friendship but never so intensely. And it wasn’t that they hadn’t trusted the other with themselves but that they hadn’t trusted themselves with the other. Despite their deep connection from the moment she’d fallen into Griffin’s arms, she’d had her doubts when it came to being good enough for Griffin and her fear of telling her about her feelings had only convinced her that she shouldn’t as it was proof against the selflessness of her love. She’d love Griffin whether she’d tell her about it or not so keeping it from her only deprived Griffin of the ability to know her own friend completely and of the chance to make her own choice. And now something had changed.

It may have been the feeling of utter loss when they’d parted from every kiss or perhaps the wrongness of those when they weren’t coming from a place of pure intentions and feelings, but it had finally made them open up to each other fully and give expression to their feelings. And that was the only gift she could ask for every day for the rest of her life as she held on to Griffin’s waist and let herself get completely carried away in Griffin's kiss, putting all of her love into what she was giving back.

Griffin pulled away, gasping for air, though not as harshly as she had all the previous times, for this kiss had given them more than it had taken from them and even the lack of oxygen wasn’t enough to kill them now that their lives were bound together. “I wanted to,” she whispered as she didn’t have enough air for more but it was enough to cause flutters in both Faragonda’s stomach and heart. Perhaps in her brain too, because she didn’t know what to say.

She took Griffin’s hand that had never left her cheek in hers and gave it a squeeze, for words seemed insufficient and unnecessary after the transformative power of the kiss. It had changed their entire reality and looking at Griffin's eyes was the only thing she needed to confirm it without a sound uttered between them. Their hearts had spoken and they’d both understood the message that had been loud and clear in the way they clung to each other like no force in the universe could tear them apart. Griffin had walked into her arms and wanted to stay there and that left Faragonda speechless as she admired the miracle that was happening between them.

“We have to go before they barge in here to collect us and any food and drinks that haven’t made it to the living room yet,” Griffin spoke quietly as if to not disturb the flow of emotions around them and as much as Faragonda wanted to stay in that moment, she had to agree. It would only be more jarring to be pulled away from their little cocoon of shared love from the others.

“I’ll go make sure Ediltrude and Griselda didn’t kill each other. They seemed to be on their way to a fight with only Zarathustra standing between them,” Faragonda said, taking a few seconds to make herself let go of Griffin since that was the last thing she wanted to do. The fact that Griffin didn’t seem to want to let go either didn’t help.

“I’m sure Zara doesn't want anybody anywhere near Griselda,” Griffin said, her voice full of amusement that was bordering on evil glee and had Faragonda stopping dead in her tracks even after she’d made all the effort to get past Griffin without giving into her urge to draw her into a hug.

“What?” she asked since she wasn’t sure she could make herself go before Griffin cleared up what she meant. Could it be that their friends were at the exact same position as her and Griffin? Well, not exact same since Griselda and Zarathustra definitely weren’t such close friends but it was still similar enough to be ironic. And if it was true, she was surprised that Griffin hadn’t tried turning the mistletoe on them yet. Perhaps Griselda and Zarathustra’s Christmas miracle was not having anyone meddling in their love life, though, as much as she hated to admit it, if not for the mistletoe, her and Griffin could have–and probably would have–still been in denial about their feelings.

“I’ll join you as soon as I’m done with the cinnamon sticks,” Griffin didn’t care to elaborate, instead acting as if she hadn’t said anything. Though, that was an answer in itself that made Faragonda hurry to the living room.

Her attention was immediately captured by the fight between Ediltrude and Griselda that still seemed to be in progress with Griselda going on and on about the health issues excessive amounts of alcohol caused while Ediltrude looked bored out of her mind. She had her arms crossed and was slouching as if Griselda’s rant was draining all the energy out of her and the whiskey she was drinking was her only saving grace. Which was bad news because the last sip of it went down her throat right as Griselda was explaining the negative effects of alcohol on the brain in gruesome detail which didn’t seem to faze Ediltrude but the lack of alcohol in her glass was a different story.

She walked away from Griselda right in the middle of her sentence and if Faragonda knew anything about her friend, it was that that would just anger her more. It wasn’t in your power to walk away from Griselda once you’d started an argument with her just like it wasn’t in your power to win said argument. Griselda was always prepared for anything that could be thrown her way which certainly made the idea of her and Zarathustra as a couple interesting since they were total opposites in that.

Improvisation was Zarathustra’s second nature which made the fact that she still hadn’t blown anything up with her experiments that much more impressive. She was more instinctual which Griselda could probably use, though they were both very adaptive which would make them a great team and perhaps that could even be expanded to a romantic context.

“Running away instead of facing your defeat?” Griselda asked as she went after Ediltrude, hellbent on not letting her off the hook.

At this point there wasn’t a force in the universe that could stop that argument and Zarathustra seemed to have figured that out as well since she was currently sitting in the armchair nearby and working on finishing the bowl of popcorn, looking rather intrigued by the spicy turn of events that was certainly more interesting than Griselda’s facts and statistics. Or perhaps it was the thought of Ediltrude’s impeding loss of the argument that provoked her interest.

Ediltrude came to a halt so abruptly that Griselda bumped into her, unable to maneuver in time to avoid collision. “I’m not running,” Ediltrude said through gritted teeth, her grip on her empty glass tightening so much that her knuckles turned white, and Faragonda was afraid she’d hurt herself if she broke the glass when she saw where she was standing. “You’re obviously in lecture mode and I can’t handle that when-” her words died in her throat when she turned around and her hand with the glass that she was going to wave in front of Griselda’s face demonstratively froze when she noticed the mistletoe hanging above their heads.

Griselda’s face changed as well when she realized what had prompted Ediltrude’s reaction without even having to look up. She pinched the bridge of her nose and exhaled slowly, looking so tortured that Faragonda almost felt bad for her. They’d brought it on themselves, though, and she couldn't help but appreciate the poetic justice.

“What’s the matter, Griselda?” Ediltrude asked smugly as she, too, seemed to appreciate the opportunity to get back at Griselda for her previous words that the situation provided her with. Too bad she was playing with fire since Griselda never let herself get cornered. “Scared of a little kiss?” she teased, forcing a mask of innocence and faked worry on her face that quickly morphed into a victorious smile when she riled Griselda up even more which was an accomplishment in itself.

The grin was wiped from her face almost instantly, though, when Griselda grabbed at her shoulders and crashed her lips on Ediltrude’s which Faragonda couldn’t even call unexpected since she doubted Griselda had ever lost an argument in her life. And just the fact that she had to kiss Ediltrude wouldn't be enough to stop her from winning this one either.

Faragonda still had to press her palm against her mouth to keep her shock from getting the best of her and her gaze darted to Zarathustra who looked like she’d been struck by a lightning, the bowl of popcorn falling from her hands and hitting the floor, ending the scandalous spectacle, the little remaining popcorn scattering across the floor much like the whole atmosphere had. That most definitely was not the justice Faragonda had wanted, nor the way she’d wanted Griffin's words confirmed.

Ediltrude seemed just as shocked as her sister, her hands raised in helplessness that would've been comical if it weren’t so painful to watch and she didn’t move a muscle even when Griselda let go of her and stepped back, looking quite shocked herself and like she couldn’t process what she’d just done. She seemed to be focusing her attention on keeping her breathing even until her brain restarted while Ediltrude had stopped breathing altogether.

The atmosphere was tense like all the air had been sucked out of the room and the ticking of the clock that could be heard in the dead silence was like the timer to a bomb. Only, there was no telling when it would hit zero and blow up their entire Christmas celebration.

Faragonda’s whole focus was on the other three women and it took her a moment to register Griffin walking past her with the punch, her head turning a little too slowly to see the movement. Griffin's steps did, however, cut through the quietness of the room loudly enough to be the trigger for the explosion that they were all waiting for with baited breath and Faragonda rushed after her to lead her out of the room before she could do the wrong thing like setting the tray with the punch down too loudly or starting a sentence with the wrong word, but she tripped over the carpet and found herself falling face-first right into Griffin's arms.

She seemed to have set down the glasses just in time to catch her once again as if to recreate their first meeting in order to celebrate the imprecise anniversary of it and the new shape their relationship had taken now and it was enough to outshine all other thoughts as if they were Christmas lights that someone had plugged out.

“I remember you promising me that you’d be more careful,” Griffin said as she helped her regain her balance, her tone teasing and caring at the same time and it drew Faragonda’s gaze to her lips. She still hadn’t quite figured out how Griffin could combine warmth and coldness in herself so perfectly but she’d learned that she was addicted to the unlikely mix. She herself lacked a bit of cold that still allowed people to take advantage of her sometimes but Griffin's ice queen demeanor was as alluring as it could be frightening. And Griffin could be plenty terrifying when she wanted to which probably should have made her take her word to her more seriously. But she’d seen enough of the green fields behind the ice walls to be unable to fear Griffin's heart.

“You’re here to catch me now,” she offered, holding on to Griffin's hands to show there was genuine emotion behind the words in equal amounts with the flirtatiousness, perhaps even more. Griffin had been there for her from the moment they’d met and she could never imagine a life that she wasn’t a part of anymore. She didn’t want to.

“Will you two just kiss already?” Ediltrude spoke, startling Faragonda with the sudden reminder that they weren’t alone.

“We’ve been doing that all day,” Griffin quipped back at her, apparently having remained more present than Faragonda who was getting carried away even now–twelve, they’ve had twelve kisses in a little over two hours, and even if not all of them had been optimal, it was still a high number that would make for an incredible Christmas tradition–during their little moment. “You covered the entire apartment with mistletoe.”

“Lesson learned,” Griselda said too quickly, giving away her discomfort with the scene that had occurred just a minute ago. Her arms were crossed as if to keep the memories of it and her bad judgment away and she avoided looking anyone in the eye.

“Oh, come on, Griselda!” Ediltrude said, taking the time to look apologetically at her sister–or at least that was what it looked like to Faragonda–before speaking. “Learn to loosen up a little,” she said as she came to stand next to her and bumped her hip into Griselda’s with a lot of force, making her lose her footing and stumble, falling in Zarathustra’s arms that kept her from hitting herself at the floor.

“Are you insane?” Griselda asked, though, her irritation didn’t seem enough to propel her to move out of Zarathustra’s hold which would be brushed off by someone who didn’t know her closely, but to Faragonda it was so telling that she felt herself clutching Griffin's hands in a death grip. Griselda wasn’t a fan of physical contact unless she felt secure enough in her relationship with the person to trust them to put their hands on her. So she might have been a little more comfortable with Zarathustra than Faragonda had realized.

“Don’t worry, Zara is right there to catch you,” Ediltrude said, winking at both of them which drew a snowstorm of protests from both women as they jumped to their feet almost in sync to defend their innocence. 

It sounded ridiculous from the side and made Faragonda and Griffin share a knowing look before leaning in for a kiss, knowing that their friends were preoccupied with their own drama to notice the change in their relationship.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Faragonda comes home to find the Christmas decorations pulled out, but Griffin seems to have disappeared. Will they need another Christmas miracle to find each other?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here comes the last chapter of this story that definitely got way too long (we’re looking at over 8k words here and just... what the hell, brain?). Anyway, I hope you’ll enjoy it because it is not exactly Christmas-focused but it has a plethora of little moments and genuine emotions and was so much fun to write. It was definitely an amazing experience that was totally worth all the effort because this chapter brings me a calm that I don’t think any of my other works ever has before.

_Griffin walked into the apartment first, her step sharp and her expression critical as she scanned the living room. She was taking the search for their own place seriously–maybe even too much–and had looked over hundreds of options, rejecting ninety-_ _eight_ _percent of the places over minor details and leaving them with a few apartments that they actually had to go to. And considering the way things were going, they were facing the very real possibility of having to look further since nothing seemed good enough to meet Griffin's high standards._

_Faragonda normally wouldn’t mind since Griffin's pickiness was usually adorable as she did that concentrated face and you could practically hear the thoughts running through her mind as her eyes took in every single detail of the thing that was currently undergoing her examination. Her perfectionism often drove everyone else around crazy but Faragonda saw in it the opportunity to spend more time with Griffin while she was assessing her purchases whether they were at the grocery store or buying furniture. Her opinion was probably biased on account that when Griffin looked at her, the critical look only appeared for a fraction of the second before her expression softened to one of pure adoration, too. It made her heart flutter every time to know that she was the one star that could melt Griffin's cold and leave behind just the warm smile and comforting presence._

_However, this time she was a little more impatient than usual since she just wanted to move in with Griffin at their new apartment. She was practically living in Griffin's current apartment already but it was a little small for both of them, their belongings scattered in places that they weren’t supposed to be, and the chaos was especially noticeable on Griffin's vanity that had all of their things piled on top of it so that it was impossible to get something without pushing another thing off of it. She just wanted to wake up next to Griffin in a bedroom that didn’t have clothes all over it since they had enough closet space and to have enough cupboards in their kitchen to hold both their favorite tea sets._

_With her mind set on the hope that they’d pick an apartment soon, she followed Griffin inside. It wasn’t her intention to trip at the threshold and tumble inside the living room and_ _in_ _Griffin's arms but it happened anyway, leaving her with a slight pain in her toes and an increasing burning sensation in her cheeks._

“ _Good thing I specialized in catching you,” Griffin teased, the mirth in her voice and the sparkle in her eyes making Faragonda heat up even more but not from embarrassment. Their faces were so close that she could feel Griffin's breath on her skin and the warmth that came from her when she was happy always made its way deep into Faragonda’s bones where it was welcome to stay long after the moment was gone and keep her company against the cold reality when Griffin couldn't be there with her._

“ _Yeah, it is,” she agreed, holding on to Griffin, for the desire to step away had never appeared and neither had the necessity which left her free to make the most of the situation. And that only seemed to make Griffin smile wider, drawing her attention to her lips and making her want to kiss her until her heart knew nothing but happiness and she’d let go of her bad memories for them to enjoy their own universe where it was just the two of them and their love._

“ _I don’t want to jinx this but if Ediltrude has taught me anything about reading the signs the universe is sending you, we might have found our apartment,” Griffin said, her whole face lighting up when the grin broke out at Faragonda’s utter shock that she’d just used her–not wrongly labeled by their friends–trademark fall to make predictions about the future._

_It had turned out to be true, though. They’d liked the apartment and Griffin hadn’t found any faults with it so they’d quickly finalized the purchase–Griffin had joked that Faragonda had been rushing things along to make sure she wouldn’t get the chance to change her mind, and perhaps she had–and they’d gotten the key to their new shared_ _home_ _. It had been surreal to hear it turn in the lock now that they were the owners of the place and she could hold on to it instead of having to return it to the woman that had shown them around._

_Griffin held up her arm, blocking her way. “Let me go in first so that I can catch you,” she said, the laughter hiding in her eyes where Faragonda could see it but it wasn’t threatening to ruin her serious demeanor._

_She tilted her head to the side as if considering it before grabbing Griffin's hand and pulling her into the apartment, careful not to end up sending them both to the ground. Not that she minded rolling around on the floor of their new apartment with Griffin but she was trying to prove a point here. “Not necessary,” she said, as she turned around and caught Griffin's hips to steady her after she’d lost her balance from the force Faragonda had used to drag her inside. “I’ve got this,” she said, leaning even closer so that there was almost no space between their lips, tempting, luring Griffin both into a kiss and a playful argument, and she held her breath waiting to see what Griffin would choose._

“ _I see,” Griffin spoke, the words breathy, and purposefully so. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly in the rhythm she set and was grinding against Faragonda’s in doing so, making her lip_ _s_ _part as her air escaped her and anticipation set in. “Well, now that both me and the key are in safe hands, I think it’s time we celebrate,” Griffin said, her tone sultry, before she leaned in and captured Faragonda’s lips in a kiss just the memory of which still made her head spin._

Faragonda pushed the handle and the door opened, her heart skipping a beat when she didn’t need to look for the key. It meant Griffin was home and she could just cuddle into her on the couch–or better yet, directly into bed–and listen to her calm heartbeat while she threaded her fingers through the long purple strands of hair absentmindedly. It helped her relax like nothing else, especially since it made Griffin hum sometimes, the content sound reverberating through her entire body and making all stress and troubles melt away.

Griffin wasn’t in the living room where she usually liked to relax but there was a big box left next to the couch that was labeled “Christmas decoration s ” so she might have gone to hunt down some other things they could need for the holiday makeover of their apartment. They hadn’t waited for Christmas to have their miracle this year since they’d wanted to celebrate the holidays in their new home  and  that had left them with the opportunity to decorate together this year. They’d gathered their favorite Christmas trinkets and had bought a bigger Christmas tree since they now had double the amount of toys to put on it. 

They’d agreed to do the decoration during the weekend but Griffin loved to be prepared so she was probably going to go through everything they had and account for anything they were missing and needed to purchase still. Faragonda was pretty sure that anything they bought from now on would be just them spoiling themselves since they seemed to have everything but she wouldn't mind. She’d been delighted to find out Griffin loved unusual Christmas trinkets and had joined her tradition of hunting down such. They had an angel for the Christmas tree that looked more like a Christmas fairy with its butterfly wings and a snowman figurine that looked like someone had been unable to decide between Christmas and Halloween and had captured the spirit of both holidays at once, giving the snowman a flying broom and a pointed witch hat.

Faragonda walked over to the couch and dropped her purse on it so that she could open the box and look for the unideer that they had found on a sale at the beginning of the year and that had prompted their first conversation about moving in together. Its single antler had been like a sign that it was ridiculous to keep maintaining two apartments when they only really needed one and Faragonda couldn’t wait to put it at an honorable place on their tree, but as she rummaged around the box carefully, trying not to break anything and cut herself, other memories started invading her mind.

_She opened the box to find Griffin's snow globes inside. There were about thirty of them–including four from trips they had been together on–and they were all unique with the spirit of the place that they’d been bought from_ _that_ _they carried. Griffin loved taking a trinket home from every place she visited to keep the memories alive and charge them with emotion and Faragonda found the chaos of the snow globes that had been scattered all over her old apartment charming considering Griffin's usual orderly manner. It was one of those little things that carried through the passion she had woven inside her, and it was absolutely enchanting._

“ _Where do you want your snow globes?” Faragonda asked as she started taking them out carefully as she didn’t want to destroy Griffin's memories. She knew what they meant to Griffin who wasn’t a fan of p_ _hotos_ _and instead held her experiences in the snow globes where they were sheltered by the little houses inside and were kept safe and away from prying eyes. They were like physical anchors that the memories were tied to and the moment Griffin looked at them, the images all came back as if pulled out of the river of memories in her mind. It was fascinating to watch it happen as Griffin's eyes changed while she was watching the past play in her mind and emotions made their way into the honey giving it different nuances. It was magical._

“ _Why don’t you find them a place? You’re better at decorating,” Griffin offered from where she was placing some of the very rare p_ _hotos_ _they had together on the shelf next to the door so that they could be looked at from the couch. She’d agreed to have them on display just as she’d agreed to take them for Faragonda’s sake, though, if Faragonda had to be perfectly honest, looking at them made her understand Griffin's obsession with privacy and reluctance to show her inner world. All the photos captured Griffin–and her–in moments that displayed such genuine emotion that having someone looking at them would be like an intrusion upon the pure moment they’d shared. “I just want the four that are separated from the rest to be somewhere I can always look at them,” Griffin said, turning to smile at her and making her rush to unwrap the mentioned snow globes._

_It was exactly like she’d expected – those were the four globes Griffin had bought on their trips together. The last one she’d even let Faragonda pick when they’d been on their summer vacation. It had proven hard to hunt down snow globes in a beach resort but they’d succeeded after going around the entire place. Faragonda had picked one that had a small boat anchored in a cove since it reminded her of their own little adventure with a boat when things had gotten positively steamy on more than one accounts and the look in Griffin's eyes was promising as she’d said she would've picked that one as well._

_Faragonda was startled by a loud yelp closely followed by the sound of glass breaking. She left down the snow globe with the boat and rushed to Griffin’_ _s side_ _to see what was the problem._

_Griffin had already knelt down and was moving around the glass_ _shards_ _. She’d dropped one of the pictures and the glass had shattered while the broken frame had pierced right through the head of Faragonda’s mother. It was the one picture of her family she treasured, for that had been the only one of the rare moments when she’d felt happy with them that had been captured in a p_ _hoto,_ _and she’d wanted to have it in their new apartment even though she didn’t even speak_ _to_ _anyone from her family anymore._

“ _I’m so sorry,” Griffin said, her voice panicked like Faragonda hadn’t quite heard it before, tugging at her heartstrings and pulling her out of her stupor. “I don’t know what happened. I know how much you value that picture and I was trying to be careful. I didn’t want to destroy it, I’m sorry,” she rambled as she looked from the mess on the ground to Faragonda and back down, the downpour of words more destructive to both of their hearts than the fall had been to the p_ _hoto_ _. “_ _I always destroy things, even when I don’t mean to,” she said, her voice breaking._

“ _It’s okay,” Faragonda grabbed at her shoulders as she knelt down too, to bring herself to Griffin's level and help her calm down. “It’s okay,” she said when Griffin looked her in the eyes and the guilt she could see in them stabbed her directly in the heart like the broken frame had been pushed through the fragile organ. “It was an accident,” she said as she cupped Griffin's face, her thumbs brushing against Griffin’s cheeks even though there were no tears there. There was self-loathing in Griffin's eyes, though, that was so acute it was a miracle it hadn’t cut through her eyeballs yet and killed them both,_ _piercing their souls_ _with the broken pieces of broken memories that it was made of_ _. “It’s fine,” she reassured, but it didn’t seem to reach Griffin who pulled slightly back to make her let go of her,_ _as if afraid the chaos in her mind would hurt her if she kept touching her._

“ _I don’t know if we can fix it,” she whispered as she looked down and the sound was so terrified that the only thing that kept Faragonda from falling to pieces was that Griffin needed her since the situation was certainly much worse in her mind than it was on the outside._ _And it was gut-wrenching to watch even the incomplete version of it that had pushed too hard for Griffin to be able to keep it inside as she always did, trying to protect everyone around her from her own feelings._

“ _It doesn’t matter,” Faragonda said, trying hard not to look at the picture to support her words but a part of her was wailing like a kicked puppy–_ _t_ _he same part that still couldn't let go of the family she had long lost–and she cast a glance that made her stomach turn. “Griffin, you’re bleeding,” she said, her voice small as she could barely get it out at the sight of the blood dripping from Griffin's hand._ _It_ _felt like it was flowing right down her throat and drowning her slowly but surely_ _and h_ _er grip on Griffin tightened as she held on to her like she was her lifelin_ _e when it was Griffin's life that was oozing out of the wound._

_There was red on the carpet, the floor, the glass shards and the picture as well that shined with the spark of Griffin's life as it drained out of her, and the more it colored everything it touched, the more Griffin would pale as she lost her vitality. She must have cut herself when she’d been moving around the glass in hopes of saving the stupid picture that Faragonda should_ _ha_ _ve thrown out ages ago. It was broken now but she’d realized too late that holding on to it wasn’t healthy for her. Griffin had had to get injured for her to figure out that she didn’t need it anymore. And it was still holding her attention when she needed to focus it on Griffin._

“ _It’s completely ruined now,” Griffin spoke, making her head snap up to find the tears falling from her eyes and leaving her with the emptiness she’d heard in her voice. She was bleeding out and she was still spilling tears over a stupid p_ _hoto_ _that shouldn’t have been there in the first place._

“ _Griffin, forget the picture!” Faragonda snapped at her as she grabbed her face and made her look at her again, the startled look in her eyes hurting her but it was much better than seeing Griffin blame herself for something that didn’t matter to her. “I don’t care about it. You’re more important to me,” she half-yelled in her desperation to get her point across and through the haze of guilt wrapped around Griffin's mind_ _and squeezing it tightly in its death grip_ _. “You’re the most important,” she said, her voice breaking at the end as her own tears spilled down her cheeks and that finally seemed to get through to Griffin who grasped at her with her unharmed hand and squeezed to show her she was there with her even if the tears were still flowing, and so was the blood. “We need to get you to the hospital,” she said, her voice coming out in uneven intervals, butchering the string of words in formless pieces. They had no idea how deep the wound was and she didn’t want to take any chances_ _of having glass pieces left inside it._

_She got up and helped Griffin to her feet, too, holding on to her to make sure the blood loss hadn’t left her weak enough to fall and injure herself more. She grabbed one of the towels that was lying around for whatever reason–she couldn't be bothered to remember insignificant details right now–and ushered Griffin out of the apartment as she was wrapping it around her hand to slow down the bleeding._

Faragonda swallowed the unpleasant memory as she closed the box, unwilling to look at all the red that dominated inside it. She turned to look at the shelf of pictures where the cursed photo had been replaced by one of the two of them with Griffin's mother that inevitably made her smile every time she looked at it. At least now she had one accepting and supportive parent that would never abandon her and Griffin no matter what, and she couldn't have asked for more.

She got up and tried not to think about the broken frame and the carpet with blood stains she’d thrown out and the photo she’d burned in front of Griffin's eyes before asking her to light her scented candles to remove the smell of smoke as well as the tears of disbelief and timid joy that had filled Griffin's eyes. It had hurt to see Griffin doubt that she loved her more than the people who’d kicked her out of her own home and didn’t even bother to call her and ask how she was doing. And as she’d hugged Griffin and felt the bandages on her hand when Griffin had hugged her back, her only regret had been that she hadn’t done that sooner. She’d had to throw them out of their life like they’d done with her long before that but she was just glad that it was over and she never had to think about that again or about the absolute terror she and Griffin had both had to go through because of a photo that shouldn’t have existed.

She saw the teapot left on the kitchen counter when she turned around as well as the cup of tea left next to it which meant Griffin had gone to grab something and should have been back already. She hated having her tea cool down and turn into flavored water. She had to go look for her.

The tray that was left on top of the stove did capture her attention first, though. Griffin usually broke it out when she baked cookies and it wasn’t unusual to see it when a special occasion was around the corner–and Griffin loved to joke that every Friday is a special occasion since it means they get to spend the next two days together without having to leave each other’s side–and even without needing one. The unusual thing was that it was still empty and no products had been left out either which begged the question what was going on.

Faragonda decided it was time she found her but as she headed towards the bedroom another memory swept over her, this one attacking her senses directly.

_The smells of tea and freshly baked bread tangled together in the air to make for a most tempting trail leading to the kitchen where Griffin was moving around completely in control of everything while she cooked breakfast and seemed to dance to the slow tunes coming from her phone. It was the sight–and smell–that anyone would want to_ _start their day with._

“ _Good morning,” Faragonda greeted, the sleep disentangling from her voice at the alluring things that wakefulness promised. She grasped at Griffin’s hips and pulled her closer to kiss her. The eggs weren’t ready yet but she didn’t have to wait to taste Griffin’s lips and it still thrilled her to be able to kiss Griffin whenever she wanted even if they’d been living together for months now,_ _and she was slowly but surely getting used to the lack of loneliness and Griffin's constant presence._

“ _Good morning,” Griffin purred when they broke the kiss, her voice a little raspy and she’d been awake for too long for it to be caused by sleepiness that still plagued her system. Which meant it was Faragonda’s eager greeting that had had that effect on her and that knowledge nestled itself into her heart and pulled her lips into a smile. “The tea is ready and I’ve put two spoons of honey in yours,” Griffin said, her honey-colored eyes shining with love and care that made her the sun of Faragonda’s life, before she pulled away to tend to breakfast._

_Faragonda looked at the two mugs and got the one_ _with_ _the tea_ _that_ _was slightly darker from the added honey since they didn’t really separate their mugs and sometimes even drank out of one when they were feeling lazy or in the mood for cheesy romance. Griffin liked her tea plain without any added sweetness, be it sugar or honey. She could add some lemon to it sometimes but other than that she drank it clear. And it looked like she hadn’t wanted to start alone since her own mug was still full._

“ _Care to join me?” Faragonda asked before taking a sip from her tea. It was the perfect temperature for drinking and she wondered how Griffin had known when to brew it. She wasn’t really surprised by the frightening precision but she’d learned not to ask about Griffin's calculations since her mind worked in mysterious ways that were better left unquestioned simply because it would take too much time for Griffin to explain that they could utilize in other ways instead. She was just happy to know that Griffin took the time to create and maintain her comfort and that was reassuring like a warm blanket wrapped around you in the cold of the winter._

“ _Of course,” Griffin answered, her arms wrapping around Faragonda’s middle from behind almost instantly and Griffin's chin resting on her shoulder. It wasn’t what she had meant but she wasn’t complaining. “I want to eat,” Griffin said, her voice drawing out in a fake whine that put a smile on Faragonda’s face._

“ _You’re the one who’s cooking,” Faragonda chuckled, waiting to see just where this would take them. She loved Griffin's less serious side for two reasons. Okay, maybe three reasons. All the reasons, honestly. But the most notable of them were that Griffin only showed that side of herself to people she really trusted and to a certain extent, and Faragonda was sure that she’d seen the most of it. And of course, there was the fact that they could goof around together in total sync since they seemed to read each other’s minds and neither of them had any qualms about showing their most childish behavior around the other. It was an understanding that Faragonda had never gotten from anyone else, and neither had Griffin as far as she could_ _tell_ _._

“ _I didn’t say that I want to eat food,” Griffin whispered_ _devilishly_ _in her ear before her lips dropped to the exposed skin at Faragonda’s shoulder and started kissing up a trail towards the sensitive skin of her neck, setting everything inside her on fire. And it would only burn harder the more she let her tease her flesh with her hard kisses and light bites that she knew just how to alternate to make her squirm and beg for more._

“ _Breakfast is on the stove,” Faragonda said as she turned around reluctantly, forcing Griffin to stop her ministrations if even for a moment. “We’ll burn the apartment down,” she said, her own mind protesting against her protests, and it was the words that seemed to stop Griffin from any further explorations of the skin on her neck, making her heart sink in disappointment. Her own desire had been awoken and stoked now, leaving her yearning for more of Griffin's touch and to touch her in return. Breakfast wouldn't do when it came to sating her hunger now._

_Griffin sighed dramatically. “Fine,” she said, before letting a big pout take over her face and make Faragonda want to kiss it off because she hated seeing it on her_ _even if it was more playful than provoked by actual hurt_ _. She had to restrain herself, though, because taking that course of action would leave them with the very real possibility of destroying the whole apartment._

_She did run her hands up Griffin’s sides, though, a solution to their problem coming to mind. “Why don’t we drink our tea while we wait for breakfast to get ready and then we can eat in bed?” Faragonda suggested, letting a salacious smile take over her face even if she didn’t need to tempt any more to have Griffin agree if her own eagerness and inability to keep her hands_ _to herself_ _was any indication._ _And the thought of falling back in bed, this time with Griffin wrapped around her, was only making that task harder but she had to control herself if she wanted their activities to not be interrupted by the fire alarm._

_Griffin's face immediately lit up with pure, unadulterated joy and she nodded enthusiastically, her excitement washing over Faragonda and making her beam as well. “I say hell yeah,” Griffin said before pulling her into a sizzling kiss._

Faragonda touched her lips at the memory of the burning passion Griffin had regarded her with. And she still did. She always did. She made her feel so wanted, so fitting, like she was a part of Griffin's life that could never be replaced, like she was her oxygen and the stars in her universe, like she was everything that gave her life. And it was so special, so magical and extraordinary while at the same time it felt so casual and cozy, and fit right into their everyday lives, making that enormous and endless love a constant in their existence like it was the most normal thing in the world. And it was. It was an inseparable part of their reality that made her feel more secure than she ever had before, than she’d ever thought was possible. Because Griffin was her home.

Faragonda entered the bedroom to find it empty. Or at least to find that Griffin wasn’t there since it couldn’t truly be empty. The space was charged with memories of calm nights that lulled her mind with their serenity and amorous escapades that left her breath hitching with the sensations Griffin had made her feel. The one that  always stood out the most was their first evening in their shared bed,  though.

Griffin had insisted that they needed to break it in even if they’d both been tired from running around and taking care of everything that  had  needed to be arranged around the moving. It had been slow and sensual, and exploratory since they’d known each other’s bodies but their souls had reconnected in a new way after the change they’d both went through at their new beginning. It had been different than before, with them fitting even better against each other–and she’d never thought that that had been possible–and feeling more complete than before, like they’d built more of their homes in each other’s hearts and not just in the physical realm and it had been indescribable. She’d wanted it to never end and in a sense it hadn’t because that deep and pure emotion was always there. In every smile and every touch, in every kiss and every word that they gifted each other with, it was always  present , providing a sense of inherent safety when they were together.

Faragonda only pulled herself out of the memory to go find Griffin and experience the real thing. It was always so enlivening and recharging for them to come together as one, and yet, it was unique every time. She had no idea how it was possible but that didn’t leave her scared because she knew she didn’t need to understand. She needed to feel it and she knew in her soul that it would never end as they were wrapped around each other and feeding their love from their souls.

She still didn’t have any luck with finding Griffin, though. She wasn’t in the bathroom which meant that there was still a possibility for a shared shower later that evening. Those always helped her relax and could also be so much fun since shower thoughts seemed to double when it was the two of them together under the hot water. They’d laughed so much that they’d even had a scare when Griffin had almost fallen during a particularly strong fit of laughter. And Faragonda herself had suffered the unpleasantness of swallowing some water. At least it hadn’t been mixed with soap since they tended to get crazy with it and the shampoo.

_Griffin seemed very concentrated on the soapy bubble that she was holding in her hand while Faragonda was finishing up on washing her hair. She only had to wash the ends now which meant Griffin could face her instead of having her back turned on her and the studious look on her face was most adorable._

_She leaned in and blew the bubble off her palm, watching it float through the empty space before a drop of water popped it. “Bubbles are so amazing,” she said, looking around for more of them but they were all washed away by the water, and the last of them were currently gathered on the floor which rendered them off-limits. Her face fell at the realization._

“ _Why is that?” Faragonda asked, not trying to hide the smile that took over her face. Griffin's fascination with the smallest of things and the associations she made with them always left her in awe and wishing to spend every waking moment with her so that she wouldn’t have to miss any of those thoughts. And Griffin trusted her enough to happily share with her thoughts that would be brushed off as meaningless and undeserving of attention–perhaps even downright stupid–by a lot of people, and that only made Faragonda appreciate them and Griffin's willingness to bring her in on her experiences that much more. She loved hearing every little thought no matter how incomplete or random it could be._

“ _They’re so insignificant and frail but they can still bring so much joy as long as you let yourself feel it,” Griffin said, her gaze distant as her mind was speeding with too many thoughts per second for her to be able to put them in words but Faragonda didn’t need her to. She could read them in her eyes, could see the passion that they were born from. Griffin knew how to love life and appreciate the little things that she’d made a home_ _out_ _of for herself since she’d often been denied the big things like friendship and acceptance. So she’d made herself welcome in the small stems of the newly grown plants she was taking care of and in the small images of the stars that were so far away and she’d learned to love them and all the other small joys that life could offer. “They can fly,” she added, kind of as an afterthought, though, it may have been hesitation that had made it sound like that since they were bringing in the motive of freedom even if through symbolism and neither one of them had ever truly had that before._

“ _Why do I have the feeling that a hot air balloon adventure is in store?” Faragonda asked, trying to keep her own thoughts off the negative emotions tied to her suggestion. She’d always wanted to try that but she’d been too scared to take off the ground, to break her ties with what held her back and risk getting lost in the unpredictable air currents. It had terrified her with the possibility to leave her completely alone even though she’d always been lonely. But now she had Griffin and that was all the connection she needed to never fear anything again. “Perhaps a picnic after that?” she threw in to make it even more tempting and custom-made._

“ _Mhm,” Griffin murmured as she draped her arms over Faragonda’s shoulders and pulled her closer, touching her forehead to hers. “I love your feelings,” she said, her eyes closed as she enjoyed the thought of the new thing they had on their to do list. Or perhaps it was the tender contact that made her look so content. Either way, she was the only sight that Faragonda wanted to look at for a long, long time. Probably forever._

Griffin was still nowhere to be seen and that was starting to worry Faragonda. If she wasn’t home, then something big–something bad–must have happened to make her rush out without even locking the door. Though, Faragonda hadn’t gotten any calls or messages and she still had one place to look at so she pushed down the panic that was slowly rising inside her stomach but was still far from reaching her throat and becoming suffocating. Two places to look at, actually, if she counted the balcony... that was empty. Even Griffin's plants had been moved inside and to the living room since the winter was just waiting to strike with its negative temperatures and Griffin didn’t want to risk their lives. She hadn’t even observed the stars recently as it was too cold outside at night and she claimed that the warmth of laying in Faragonda’s lap with a book in her hands and a mug of tea nearby was too tempting.

_Faragonda held both mugs with one hand as she used the other to open the door to the balcony. She stepped outside, careful not to trip and spill the hot tea and hurt herself. Falling into Griffin's arms would be more of a disaster rather than a lucky save this time since it would probably result with both of them getting scalded by their favorite drink and possibly psychologically scarred enough to refuse to drink tea anymore. And that was pretty much the exact opposite of what she was trying to do._

“ _I brought you some tea,” she said when she managed to complete the operation of letting herself out on the balcony and closing the door behind her back successfully, and moved one of the mugs in her other hand to make sure she had a better grip on it. It would be a shame to drop them now while she waited for Griffin to tear herself away from the telescope, even if that could take a while._

_Astronomy was one of Griffin's biggest passions and she’d even saved enough money to buy her own professional telescope which Faragonda knew hadn’t been easy on her since it had meant buying less books. Griffin had persisted, though, doing what was necessary to follow her dream and give herself the best opportunity to explore the stars, her face lighting up like their light had entered her soul and was giving it an internal shine just as bright as they were. And Faragonda could never think to step between Griffin and the night sky and cast a shadow on that pure happiness. Not because she was afraid Griffin would shove her aside and choose the stars over her, but because she was always struck by respect and awe–and perhaps even some envy, since she herself still hadn’t found her own passion that was as special to her as the stars were to Griffin–at the sight of Griffin and her deep connection to something that was so far away, and still, that couldn’t stop her from giving it all of her love, it couldn’t frighten her out of feeling for it._

“ _Taking care of me now, are you?” Griffin teased as she stepped away from the telescope and the smile she’d already had on her face just like she always did when she was exploring the night sky widened even more when she looked at her. “All bundled up like an early Christmas present?” she asked as she stepped closer and pulled Faragonda’s wool hat downwards to the point where it almost covered her eyes and made her scowl since her hands were occupied and she couldn’t fix it or stop Griffin from any further interventions when it came to it._

“ _I’m getting cold just looking at you,” she scolded half-seriously as she gave Griffin a critical once-over. She’d put on a light-weight jacket this time but she was usually so underdressed when she stayed out on the balcony at night that Faragonda feared she’d catch a cold or even a pneumonia. It was pretty much the only complaint she could think of when it came to Griffin's stargazing and observations. “And yes, of course,” she added, trying to ease the exasperation out of her voice. “I will always take care of you,” she said, her eyes getting glossy just at the thought that Griffin could have any doubts about that._

“ _Thank you,” Griffin said softly when she didn’t really have to because it was all in her eyes. They were glowing with gratitude and appreciation and made Faragonda’s heart warm to know that Griffin knew how much she loved her. “Come here,” Griffin said as she took both cups from her hands and put them on the windowsill, before grasping at her arm and guiding her to where she wanted her so that Faragonda was standing in front of her, Griffin's front pressed against her back and her arms wrapped around her middle. At least it allowed her to fix her hat so that she could actually see and she tried to focus on what they were currently doing and push away the thought of the abandoned tea that was facing the possibility of cooling off too much to be drinkable._

“ _What are we looking at?” she asked, remembering those times when Griffin had spent hours acquainting her with every region of the night sky and what shiny friends could be found there. She couldn't boast that she’d remembered all of the stars Griffin had shown her but she’d been more than glad to just sit and listen, and gaze – at the stars and at Griffin, whose expression had been overflowing with emotion as she’d talked, and Faragonda had gladly let those feelings take over her, too, so that she could share Griffin's exaltation just like Griffin had hoped when she’d made the invitation. Faragonda could never regret those nights–not even the following mornings when sleep deprivation had proven to be a bitch–if only for the fact that Griffin had been so grateful to have her passions respected even if they weren’t fully understood. And she’d always treasure them, for she knew how hard it had been for Griffin to put her heart in Faragonda’s hands going against all her previous experiences with the insane hope that it wouldn’t be dropped and broken. And she’d turned to the stars and made not a wish, but a promise. A promise that she would always take care of Griffin's heart and soul, and her entire being, and wouldn’t stop loving her even when every last star had lost its shine and the sky was left dark and empty._

“ _The skies of course,” Griffin said like it was so simple, and the most obvious thing, the most natural thing in the world. And really, it was. It was so natural and familiar, and secure that it made Faragonda go “oh” at how clear the answer had been. “They’re all ours, endless and full of possibilities as they are,” Griffin said, her voice dreamy as she wandered into a fantasy about the future that was all in front of them just like the night sky was. It was just as vast and dark but now that they had each other and their light, it wasn’t scary anymore like it had been once._

“ _I’m ready to dive in it with you,” Faragonda said as she turned her head to the side from where she hoped Griffin could see how much she meant it. It wouldn’t be falling since she was walking into their future with eyes wide open, ready and wanting to be there. In fact, there was not a thing she wanted more in the whole world, and her wish was coming true little by little with every day that they shared, making them all gifts in themselves, and she didn’t need more. Just to feel Griffin holding on to her like the skies held the stars and offered them a home for eternity._

_Griffin pressed herself closer as she hummed, the low sound passing through Faragonda’s body and making all her numerous cells vibrate on the frequency of happiness and comfort that reached even the depths of her soul._

Faragonda headed out of the bedroom in search of that same sensation that she could use now, and Griffin was the only one who could provide it so she had to find her. There was just one place to look now and she walked down the corridor towards the only room she still hadn’t checked. Mostly because that one was always empty.

They had one room left that they hadn’t really needed, or perhaps had both been unwilling to use for anything else than what it had been designated for now. They’d agreed it would stay empty and untouched so that one day, if they felt ready for it, they could turn it into a room for their child. It was a symbol of the chance they were giving themselves because filling it with other parts of their lives that they’d need to throw out if they decided to become parents felt somewhat offensive both to them and to the future child they could have as it wouldn’t come as a replacement for something they no longer wanted.

They were both excited at the prospect of becoming mothers but they were still anxious and insecure in themselves and their capabilities of taking care of someone else. They both still had major crisis over mistakes they made in their relationship and didn’t feel ready to add a child to their family yet. And perhaps they never would. But the thought was present and they wanted to make sure that they’d left enough space in their lives to make it possible one day if they felt capable of raising a child.

The door opened silently to reveal Griffin who was sitting in the middle of the room cross-legged and seemed lost in thought. Perhaps even the same thoughts that had been running through Faragonda’s head. And she didn’t know how to snap Griffin out of it gently, for she didn’t want to startle her and add more fear in her heart than the one that was most certainly there already.

“I’m sorry I didn’t come out to meet you,” Griffin spoke first, so perhaps she hadn’t been as swallowed in thoughts as Faragonda had assumed. Or perhaps she was even more plagued with them and was trying desperately to hold on to the reality where she wasn’t drowning in all those questions that were made heavy with the insecurities attached to them that some aspects of the future caused to surface. “I was trying to put some order in my thoughts,” Griffin said, answering Faragonda’s unasked question. It explained why she’d chosen the empty room where there was enough space for all of her thoughts to run free until they unraveled themselves so that they wouldn't clog up her mind anymore.

“Are you scared?” Faragonda asked as she made her way to Griffin and sat down on the floor next to her, taking her hand both to give her support and remind her that she was there to take some of the burden off of her shoulders as they now shared everything. The good and the bad, the happiness and the fears too. They were together no matter what was thrown at them. And she’d come sit next to her whether it was in front of the Christmas tree that was all decorated and radiating happiness or in the empty room that lured in with a promise but scared with a threat. She would always stay at her side because that was her place.

“Yes,” Griffin nodded as she looked at her, her eyes wet but the look in them wasn’t quite what Faragonda had expected. “But I can also see things much clearer now,” she said, moving her gaze away as if unsure whether she should share, whether she was ready to, and Faragonda waited patiently for her to decide, which seemed to play a role in the outcome. “I can see myself warming up milk instead of tea and you checking the temperature to make sure it’s not too hot. I can see myself reading bedtime stories while you take out a well loved blanket from the closet. I can see you buying stuffed toy after stuffed toy that eventually turn into a pet that I never wanted but it still makes its way into my heart since it’s part of the family. I can see you buying little warm clothes and hats, and gloves while I’m picking healthy food products and educational toys. I can see this room filling with life and laughter. And I can see us both buying gifts to put under the Christmas tree even though we’d already gotten the biggest and best gift anyone could want – our family.” Griffin squeezed her hand as if to make sure she was still there and Faragonda returned the gesture to show her support. “And I think that... that I would really like that,” Griffin said as she turned to look at her. “Some day, I mean,” she added quickly, her gaze moving all around the room that currently offered nothing to hold it so that it didn’t have to return on Faragonda.

“I can see that too,” Faragonda nodded, watching as Griffin's eyes slowly found her face and her expression changed as if she was too stunned to have her wishes answered and returned. It still stabbed Faragonda in the heart with the whispers of past loneliness that echoed those in her own mind too closely for her liking but she tried to focus on the present and even the future. “The skies are ours, remember?” she asked as she reached to stroke Griffin's cheek, hoping it would soothe the anxiety in her mind as well, and it seemed to do the trick. It was a little miracle that had nothing to do with Christmas, because they had each other. And that was all the miracle they needed since their love made miracles happen all the time when they were together.


End file.
